She works hard for the money

Stay at home mommy. Working outside mommy. (I say outside cuz we are alllll workin’, right mommies?!) I ain’t got a dog in the fight. Or maybe I have two. I’m too busy being both and neither to decide.
I am the hybrid. I am the unicorn. I am the thing that the working mom says she would do ideally. I am the thing the staying home mom thinks would be bearable (maybe even ideal) and just the way to have it all.
There have been a few popular blogs lately about the things that we mommies say to each other. The ways we judge each other. (If mommies are anything we are a judgy judgy posse.) I’m reminded of a quote from Tina Fey in Mean Girls – “… you all have got to stop calling each other sluts and whores. It just makes it ok for guys to call you sluts and whores.”
Here’s the truth. We all want it all. And that’s what we’re all trying to do. The marriage. And the mommieness. The career. And the pinterest cupcakes. The body. And the hair.
And frankly none of us are doing it all (if you are none of us like you and we are totally talking about you behind your back while eating your delicious organic hand iced cupcakes). And that’s okay. It’s the truth.
The truth is that despite what we’ve been told we can’t have it all. Not all at once anyway. And not without a household staff and ADD meds and robot kids.
It’s all about prioritizing and accepting certain things won’t get done.
The truth is that us mommies judging each other gives all those nonmommies (who are super judging us) even more evidence with which to judge us. There’s a wretched writer (excellent at times writing/wretched views) named Elizabeth Wurtzel who goes so far as to say being a mom isn’t a job at all because we don’t get paid for it and we mommies need to zip it. Poor logic considering the going prices for nannies and housekeepers and chauffeurs and personal stylists and bakers and counselors and gardeners and cooks.
We all get one life. Just the one. One set of kids. One career path. One husband (unless you’re a sister wife). And while we can say all day that we just don’t know how the working mom spends so much time (gasp) away from her kids or how the stay at home mom (cringe) doesn’t lose herself in household madness by week’s end – truth is we are all just doing what we can to make it in the Mommy hood.
As for this unicorn? I’ve been working from home for nearly five years. It is amazing. It is wonderful. It is awful. It is hard. It is a strange life lived without any homeland. It’s my own creation. It is the best and worst of both worlds. I love it. Love it. Love it. But it’s much more than the happy medium between staying home full time and clocking in full time. Like every job and child and marriage, it is a balance that is so uniquely your life there is no explanation. You can only live it. And so this mommy has decided to stop judging (at least a little less) because none of us know how hard or easy any of us mommies really have it. But I can say for certain there’s no job in the world like a mommy job no matter what that wretched Elizabeth Wurtzel says. It is the hardest most worth it thing I know I’ll ever do. Wherever and however I’m working.

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Everybody works around Casa de Bedgood.

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About Amanda Jean Elliott

I am a joyful believer in Jesus Christ, a mother, a sister, a writer, a maker of gluten free roux and a style editor. I love my son Wilder and the wild life that comes with a 4-year-old who has the energy of a pack of wolves. I also love naps (a lot). I love to cook and create my favorite dishes without gluten not because I'm trendy and anti-gluten so much as it makes me feel like I've been run over by a pack of wolves. I teach 5th and 6th grade girls Sunday School and have a classroom of the greatest girls I could imagine. Girls who often teach me more than I teach them. I believe these girls and many others are the spark to start a fire for The Lord the likes of which this world has never seen. I see more and more girls learning about more than just who God is ... but, learning about who God says THEY are. It is my prayer for every woman to know without doubt that we have a good good Father in heaven and whatever is not right on this earth, He will make right in this life or the next.
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